Monday, September 14, 2009

Posh Spice: formerly known as Victoria Beckham

Let's get this one out of the way so I can get a decent night's rest. First of all, what is she doing in fashion when her true art is in wearing it? The collection I saw was a mish mash of too many ideas with no center or thread holding them together. My first question to her would be: "Would you wear these dresses"? My second one would be:" Why"?

When I work as a critic with design students I often have to ask those questions. The clothes generally don't appear to relate to the designer responsible for them. Whether or not she has a big name designer ghost designing the collection for her, there should be something stylistically about them that echoes her personal taste. When every neckline is about 5 inches from the model's neck it begs the question, " What about breasts? cleavage? sex appeal?" Every photograph with rare exceptions , show Victoria Beckham with her "Bubbies" hanging out. There weren't any necklines in this collection that even approached the idea of being revealing. It was utterly chaste and dull.

Corny padded shoulder straps looked awkward. Degrade-dyed charmeuse wedges, even sack minis, with one awkward tuck were an attempt at artiness.The gowns, though often body hugging were strangely topped with poorly cut bateau necklines. The colors of most of them were simply unappealing. I kept asking myself why? If this is the best she can get out of Roland Mouret or whoever is in the kitchen? She really should rethink getting back her day job. The look of the presentation was sad. The models were sad looking and nothing about it looked authentic.There was only one dress that did the job and sais, "Victoria". The yellow stunner to the left.

Ego is a dangerous thing. Fashion design is even more treacherous. If you're going to put it out there make sure you've done the best you can and given it the most critical eye before you send it down the conveyor belt. With her experience in the world of celebrity and the first hand experience of wearing and owning extraordinary clothes what was she thinking of with this sad group, not collection, but group of frocks?

A name is only that. Sure, some hardcore clueless women will buy it, along with some equally jaundiced-eyed retailers, but in the end they will languish on the sale rack until they grow hair or are cut to 80% off. My money is on the hair.....

7 comments:

Ms. B said...

Delightful post! When you find the piece that starts to grow hair, make sure you take a picture, I wanna see it :)

Simone said...

My question when I see her designs is who altered all of the sheath dresses left in Marilyn's closet. Her designs are for her body, which isn't a bad thing if she just admits that she wanted a new wardrobe and couldn't find a thing on the racks that suited her.Have a look on voguepatterns.com and you will find many options to make a dress like hers..How is the construction? Have you ever looked inside one? (Curious but not curious enough to seek one out..sigh)

missnash said...

A- MEN!
I couldn't agree more.
She couldn't dance, she definitly couldn't sing, and now she's showing the world and his wife that she can't design either.
I would side with you and say - 'yeah, just go back to your day job Victoria' but what was that exactly? Being David Beckham's wife?
Regardless of the fact that these dresses are all so f-ugly and inappropriate for any occasion what-so-ever (wedding, nope; luncheon, nope, weekend, nope; night out on the town, nope,) I would NEVER buy ANYTHING made by a woman whose wardrobe needs wants and desires are so completely different to my own. Her lifestyle dictates that she couldn't possibly know anything about what everyday, chic, fashion forward women need and want. She lives in a bubble of her own strange making, and doesn't know how to cater to anyone with a job (for example,) that necessitates using public transport, dealing with the natural elements or sitting down after eating a proper meal.
Who is going to go to work/to grab a coffee/go on a date in any of these dresses?! They are so totally boring, restrictive and unflattering it begs BELIEF.
Put the sharpie DOWN Victoria before you HURT YOURSELF!

Anonymous said...

If these are to be sold at Macy's, (next to the Jessica Simpson collection, perhaps?) I won't be offended. But I'd better not see them at Saks, Neimans or Barneys.

Jita (in Chapel Hill) said...

Well said, Fluff. I'm commenting now because I don't konw if you all have seen this "group" (not collection!) of Victoria's dresses on a celebrity or two eg: featured on gossip girl, worn by elle macpherson, as well as most recently by Drew Barrymore to a premiere no less! Its so sad because these dresses will probably make a whole lot of money and I mean...damn Drew, you could be helping a struggling designer, promoting real fashion, and you choose to wear that purple heap? It really didn't look good on her, and ugh...sigh. The larger question, I have to ask, is all the praise that this group of dresses has gotten in the media, from legitimate voices in fashion. Why aren't more people standing up and saying "what the?" instead of the "she's no amateur" reviews I seem to be reading...?

Brian said...

Ironic that you mention that yellow dress as being the best piece in the whole show. It looks very familiar...

Maybe Posh should've hired you instead!!!

Fluff Chance said...

Brian,
You're scaring me.....That was a frighteningly subconscious choice on my part. I guess I'm busted. Thanks for holding up the mirror.
Fluff