Monday, January 25, 2010

Vera wants a reality show...Take a ticket. The line forms to the left.

Swine flu is nothing compared to the virus which is Fashion reality TV. These shows are sprouting up everywhere on every major cable network for every demographic. You can't schuss the flat screen without running over one on any given night. From Project Runway to the Fashion Show to Launch my line to America's Top Supermodel and on and on. I think I've made myself clear as to my thoughts on PR and the Fashion Show. Launch My Line is another beast altogether. This show is one of the most poorly conceived step children of the litter.Total posers with no experience in the business or craft of fashion design decide that they want it, therefore, they can have it...even succeed at it. Each loser is paired with an industry "Expert" and all square off against each other to win a 50k prize and a chance to sell their line on an overstock/sample sale Internet site called Rue La La. The hosts are the twin brothers behind the Dsquared2 label. From the beginning it was a recipe for disaster, but has ended up the lowest entertainment I've seen. This show makes Tyra look like a P.H.D..

The hapless contestants don't know or do anything but force their"experts" to do all the design and construction. There are cat fights, people storming out, buckets of tears and ego tantrums that set a new standard for the shabbiest casting to date. There was a line uttered by a contestant whose job to date was being photographed at shows in utterly outlandish costumes, make-up and attitude. His day job had been as a Sales Director for a designer. When the group was given the task of going out to Venice Beach to pick up on trends to incorporate into the challenge of the week, he actually said, " I don't pick up on trends, I set them!" That was when I stepped away from the TV, grabbed the remote and took a long walk around the block.

These shows have created and perpetuated this idea that anyone can be a designer and anything , no matter how lame will capture an audience as long as the word Fashion is tacked to it. I have a problem with this. That isn't to say that there isn't an entertainment quotient to be found in some or all of these shows, but they aren't REAL and it isn't fashion. You may disagree with me and even say to each other, "what make him so sure?" It's just a feeling I have after spending 22 years in the business as a designer that this is not the reality I experienced.

Now Vera wants in. The troubling aspect to all of this "pants down around your ankles" on weekly TV is just that at a certain point we've seen it all, already. Vera's story is even more familiar than most designers. Will we follow her from her Park Ave. pile to the studio(by limo) after listening in on her instructing the chef and maid as to what she NEEDS. Perhaps, we get to see a fitting with an Olympic figure skater or a bridezilla. Maybe we'll sit in on a very high level meeting with the top brass from Kohl's. Either way, it probably doesn't make for any better TV than Puffy's lame show or Dawg, the Bounty Hunter. Until Fashion reality shows start taking on the actual mechanics and day to day grind of creating clothes in the REAL world, everything will be a sad exercise of the banal.

20 comments:

Old School Brand said...

I nearly fell off my chair when you said,"That was when I stepped away from the TV, grabbed the remote and took a long walk around the block."
You are so right on and hilarious
!!
Your posts make my CATTY DAy!!

Unknown said...

Hahahaha...my sentiments exactly but I applaud your bravery for getting past the commercials for the shows and actually watching them..that old saying "curiosity killed the cat" comes to mind so be very careful :) because I don't think there will ever be enough satisfaction from any of these shows to bring you back!

SmartChicStyle said...

I couldn't agree more! These cheap reality shows are more brand destruction than anything else!

Dovima said...

Precisely precisely precisely. Found this post through Racked, and totally agree with you. Stop with the "fashion" reality shows. They aren't fashion! Too many people think they can be in fashion because of these horrible shows. Yet most of them are not nearly talented enough. They just know how to make a scene, not an outfit.

chris in sf said...

child, did I not say in your other post that L.M.L was the ugly-step sister to P.R? It's such a tacky train wreck.. but we can't help but watch, in slow motion! And, those lady judges.. who ARE they? who CARES? And, WHAT are they wearing!? It's funny to see how LA people DO think that they set all the trends in the planet... delusion, party of 2!
As for RuPaul's Drag Race, don't go dissing my girls... those queens have more talent than any of these other "fashion" contestants... let's face it, dresses in their sizes aren't easy to get and they need to get very creative to bring forth their drag personas. THAT requires a modicum of talent, no? Plus, they're not on TV pretending to be fashion experts.... calling yourself a "designer" simply because you sat at a few shows on Bryant Park is another story. And, that DJ guy in the top 3, YIKES! What woman, in her right mind, would be caught dead wearing any of the "garments" he designed?!!! The fact that the "judges" insisted that they could easily sell some of his stuff in their stores, well, there must be something in the smog or the water down there, that's all I got to say 'cause all I could think of was to gouge out my eyes when I saw the stuff... If, I was a woman, I would be insulted that this is how this idiot thinks women should look in public. Since when is crack whore at 4 am on Polk St. any look for a lady? Then, I tell myself, this isn't real, it's just a silly show...
Yes, it would be nice to see a real show about the true process of designing a collection; the trials and tribulations, the blood, sweat and tears... It will have to be a documentary and it'll probably air on Sundance channel late at night, and no one will watch it because it'll be "boring". Speaking of, I highly recommend the documentaries about St. Laurent, Lagerfeld and Valentino.

Anonymous said...

Yep. These "fashion" shows are as close to reality as "Jon & Kate Plus 8" was to a loving couple in a committed relationship. Hey, what do you want to bet Jon turns up on one of these shows? I hear he's available.

Anonymous said...

What is unfortunate in this fashion " reality' nonsense is that fashion has lost, in part, its mystery and essence. so many brands work so hard to put a great product out there and this just ruins a really serious profession.
It promotes this idea creating fashion is an easy task. The truth about fashion is that it cannot be done by just anyone who has a great idea for a dress or a coat. However in a country where celebrity status can be achieved by doing absolutely nothing- Paris Hilton comes to mind- it's not a surprise that shows like Make my own line is on the airwaves. I won't even talk about those twins not enough space or time.

But the fashion system- this reminds me of franco Moschino- is to blame also for this nonsense. The need to make a designer- a real one that is- a mega star beyond humanity and to license his or her name to products that are unrelated to the brand is partly the cause. it should be about exquisite product but greed is the focus in most cases.
As for Wera Wang the idea of having her own "reality" show is simply.... greed- there is it again. The self promotion of her " lifestyle" that we care nothing for would sell clothes and enlarge her bank account. I would not be surprised if it's the people at Khols who put her up to it.
I would like Vera to answer this question for me what happens after you obtain this " reality" show and your bank account is fatter than Ralph's and you are more popular in a negative way- she's known not to be too nice- then what? What will be next, the Vera channel, Vera magazine, Vera coffee latte, Vera red bean ice cream, Vera tylenol luxe ...... what?

Anonymous said...

Amen Fluff. My GOD - Launch my Line is such a pile of shizz. I watched one episode about a month ago, only because Lady Gaga was going to be on it, and then was APPALLED by the general thrown-together logistics of the competition, the overemotional and underqualified contestants and the HIDEOUS hosts, who looked and sounded like they knew even less than the people they were goading on.
I want that 57minutes of my life back. (The other 3 I don't need so much, because time spent watching Gaga is time well-spent, no matter what show/stage/screen she's on.)
I am so furious it's enough to drive me to do very drastic things indeed. Like write a VERY strongly worded letter to the producers of that atrocious show. You know an English woman is p*ssed off when she goes to put pen to paper and has stamps at the ready.
Watch yo'selves Bravo...!

Let's pray Ms Wang comes to her senses and realises that having a reality TV show will do NOTHING but damage her brand.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on the Spring Couture collections....
VALENTINO?!?!?!?! What happened there...?!

Miss Nash

Anonymous said...

Amen Fluff. My GOD - Launch my Line is such a pile of shizz. I watched one episode about a month ago, only because Lady Gaga was going to be on it, and then was APPALLED by the general thrown-together logistics of the competition, the overemotional and underqualified contestants and the HIDEOUS hosts, who looked and sounded like they knew even less than the people they were goading on.
I want that 57minutes of my life back. (The other 3 I don't need so much, because time spent watching Gaga is time well-spent, no matter what show/stage/screen she's on.)
I am so furious it's enough to drive me to do very drastic things indeed. Like write a VERY strongly worded letter to the producers of that atrocious show. You know an English woman is p*ssed off when she goes to put pen to paper and has stamps at the ready.
Watch yo'selves Bravo...!

Let's pray Ms Wang comes to her senses and realises that having a reality TV show will do NOTHING but damage her brand.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on the Spring Couture collections....
VALENTINO?!?!?!?! What happened there...?!

Miss Nash

Anonymous said...

For a heavy hitting dose of reality, you should check out the documentary, 'Schmatta: From Rags to Riches to Rags'. Now that's real and raw.

Anonymous said...

Vera, back off now, while your name is still spoken in awe by young brides. Be exceptionally grateful for your successes. Don't think that dabbling with the masses will enhance your prestiage. You've been touched by the gods to have such success in bridal wear -- re-invent it again, in a land that's more than willing to overpay for a one-wear gown. Please.

Anonymous said...

Amen! You are the the sharpest knife in the kitchen!

Felicia, This Time in Seoul

madeleine said...

Oh dear. I remember when designers wouldn't allow buyers to do fast sketches, let alone take pictures. But I also, lol, remember a Banksy (I think Dennis Hopper bought it) that said, written on an old television set ... "someday we will all have fifteen minutes of anonymity ..."

Anonymous said...

couldn't agree more.
however, allow me be a devil's advocate. say there's chance for YOU to have your own reality show, would you do it?
I think you would RUN to.
in your medium, it is the best thing that could happen to you (make it even better to coincide that with a new book by you on the shelves in borders everywhere).
vera wang might be greedy and show her ass with wanting a reality show.
:) but then, so did you in the last "Snuggie" post.
just saying.

p.s. but i would like to see your quirkiness on TV. you are too good (and sexy) to be hidden behind this blog and not to be experienced tête à tête.

Fluff Chance said...

Dear most recent Anonymous,
You make an interesting point. I did show my ass, and have struggled with whether or not that was the most responsible move I could have made. The jury is still out on that. I was in a playful mood and felt like pushing the envelope that day. I hesitated a good hour before I hit "Publish" and then sat in a state of fear that I'd overstepped the bounds of decorum. But given the opportunity to be a part of a Fashion related reality show, I would most likely jump at the chance. I would be very careful as to the thrust and quality of the project and not do something solely for the sake of exposure. I value this forum and have too much regard for this business, despite my often acerbic tone. I am playing with a book project as we speak, but would welcome a chance to reach a broader audience through television. Some might say that's hypocritical. I would hope that I would bring something fresh to the table that just expands on my views expressed here. Humanity and humility would always be the core of my message. That I wouldn't cash in for the sake of air time. Thank you for your comment and for encouragement.
Sincerely,
Fluff/Eric

everyday a floor show said...

You know what a mess the overly made up "twin" conveys to the audience...another 15 minutes of fame.Granted he has a wardrobe to die for...always a spectacle on the street.
Wang is a success in spite of her overbearing demeanor.She is supported by marvelous marketing but has branded herself into oblivion.Yep, she works hard and deserves all the commotion..but a reality show?What next the Desiree Rogers advice on borrowing clothes show?

What design students need is to be immersed in classes in taste, manners and the history of design.Doubtful any of the realty show designers even know the difference between grain de poudre and gabardine or who was Mme. Carven.
Don't get me started on the the brothers behind d squared.
Hey...I guess all the years of riding on a horse has kept that derriere truly bodacious..my my.

NYC Single Mom said...

Love your comments. Vera Wang left the fashion world when she starting "designing" for Kohls. Anyone who has seen her be interviewed knows that this show is destined to be a dud. She is sooo boring. She is such an uninteresting brand.

st. valentine said...

Great post - and by the way, I like your website redesign :D

Christa Weil said...

I would like to see Dawg design a fashion line with Vera as mentor. Bail Bond Chic. That is all. xxC

Anonymous said...

You can't be surprised--angry perhaps--over this turn of events. Small businesses are dropping every day, bankruptcies are everywhere, so people are using venues they once frowned upon. Reality shows (RuPaul's Drag Race is one of the latest)are television's latest profitable ghetto.